Battle at the Box Office: Jessica Alba vs. Eva Longoria

Note to self: Jessica REALLY hates it when she burns things in the oven. Ok…It’s a question that a guy can only dream about. Who should you spend the night with? Jessica Alba or Eva Longoria? Unfortunatley by "spending the night" I mean which movie should you watch…Jessica Alba’s horror flick The Eye or the Eva Longoria romantic comedy Over Head Dead Body. Both movies are out today and the industry has The Eye pegged to make around $13 million this weekend which should be enough for #1 considering no major releases.

Battle at the Box Office: Method Man vs. Rambo vs. Step Dancing

Today four films will have major releases: Sylvester Stallone’s violence-fest Rambo, the 300 spoof film Meet the Spartans which features Method Man, the internet killer thriller Untraceable and the new step/hip-hop dance film How She Move with cameos by Mya and Keyshia Cole. All four of these films must go against the box office monster Cloverfield. According to industry projections this is how the battle at the box office should shake out for the weekend:

#1. Cloverfield: (projected $25M) All that camera shaking gets me more nauseous than watching Missy Elliott down a bag of Doritos

#2. Rambo: (projected $18M) Apparently Rambo kills an average of 3 people per minute in the movie. Even Suge Knight couldn’t pull that off.

#3. Meet the Spartans: (projected $15M) These spoof movies tend to do well with younger males and most young guys already saw Cloverfield opening weekend. Method Man actually has a decent role as the Persian Emissary and the TV spots showed him in attempt to broaden the demographic reach.

#4. 27 Dresses (projected $12M) I got nothing on this one. Still is the #1 pick for females of all ages.

#5. Untraceable (projected $8M) A killer hooks up a person to a machine and shows it on a website. The more hits the website gets, the closer the machine gets to killing that person. What a morbid concept. Imagine if that website showed the Vivica Fox sex tape instead? That sucker would be DEAD.

#? How She Move (projected $4M) Holy crap! A step/hip-hop dancing move that has random guest artists (Mya, Keyshia Cole), a dance montage on the roof tops of a building…and a final competition at STEP MONSTER! Even though this was a relatively low budget film, Paramount Vantage went all out with the marketing trying to capture that "urban" audience. Too bad all the non-urban kids are waiting for Step Up 2 The Streets in two weeks.